An Open Letter to My Grad School Self

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Dear Future Me,

I wonder how you are doing. How have you been treating yourself? Are you sad, feeling down, upset, angry, maybe even annoyed? Or are you happy, excited, thrilled, and confident?

I’m thinking of you at this moment. I’m excited and nervous at the thought of grad school. It seems like a great time for me to grow and go after my goals. I feel like I’ll learn a lot about my future career and more about myself. I’m also nervous and anxious at the thought of failing. Perfection is something that I often strive for, something that I’ve learned to be accustomed to. Progress and acceptance are my new goals.

Tell me, future self, do I reach those goals? Am I working towards them? Do you like your classes? What are online classes like? Everything seems uncertain yet sure.

I hope that you’ve been making time for yourself. I hope that you’re still working on this blog and communicating with friends. I hope that you’re reaching out and asking for help when needed. I hope that you’re not feeling alone.

I hope that you’re also being kind to yourself. I hope that, when you read this, you’re still loving yourself. Loving you for your brain, your body, your personality, and for just being you.

I hope that you’re still in love. I hope that you’re still in a relationship that is both-sided and full of love, acknowledgement, trust, and acceptance. I hope you feel loved and that you are giving love.

Lastly, I hope that you’re still believing. Believing in yourself when times are difficult and situations seem nearly impossible. Believing in life and recognizing its beauty, even though some days and moments seem dark and gloomy. I hope that you continue to believe in humanity, and remind yourself that there is still good in people.

You’ve gone so far and you’re already doing so well. I’m looking forward for what’s yet to come. There is always something to be done and something that we can do to improve. You got this — We go this!